Coming Out Stories- 7 Books to Get You Started

We have all heard the term Coming Out of the Closet several times in our day-to-day lives. This term is used chiefly by the people of the LGBTQ+ who reveal their sexual preferences, orientations of sex and romance etc.

This full term has now been shortened to just Coming Out which people are more comfortable with nowadays. But, this process is a very difficult one for individuals as they fear what society will think of them if they reveal their sexual changes to them. They are especially afraid of their families’ reaction to their confessions.

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Let’s try to understand this term a bit more. The first step in this process is to come out to yourself. When you are clear that you have a changed sexual identity and must be able to accept it fully.

When you are confident and comfortable in your new sexual identity, then you can reveal the same to your close friends and family. Sometimes individuals tell this thing right away, but for others, it takes time to reveal their new sexual identity quickly.

So, coming out isn’t a one-time affair because when we meet anyone we know that he/she is straight and not of the other sex. But, an individual in the LGBTQ+ community needs to be constantly aware of their new sexual identity and let others know of the same when they meet for the first time.

And coming out doesn’t have to be everywhere. An individual can decide where and when he/she wants to come out and speak openly about their new sexual identity.

Coming out also may have its benefits and risks. Your family may or may not support your decision fully and keep forcing you to be someone else which you know you’re not. This can bring in a lot of stress and tense situations for you and your family. The person may have to wait for the situation out until the environment is more accepting and friendly.

You can also follow some steps when you have finally decided to come out and tell your family that you have changed your sexual identity.

1. Allow yourself some time to practice and memorise what will you be telling your family and in what order.

2. Secondly, make sure you know certain people who will be willing and accepting of your coming out of the situation and go to them first. You will immediately get a sense of how normal people react to an LGBTQ+ person whenever such things come up in their conversations.

3. Always keep your research handy when you are coming out to your family as they don’t have much information or facts about these things.

4. If you are not up to the task of telling the news verbally to your family, you can always share this thing in an email or message through which they can come to know of your present situation. This method is totally fine and acceptable.

5. After you have fully told everyone the truth in your family, give them some time and space to consider the situation and come to terms with the facts. Not every family is accepting and welcoming when it comes to such situations.

6. Never assume that you will be prejudiced in your family when you tell them about your sexual orientation. Many times there are members who will fully accept the fact and they may also tell you of other people who are a part of the LGBTQ+ community with whom they are in touch.

So, these are some of the tips that you need to keep in mind when discussing such a sensitive topic with your friends and family.

Now, some writers have written about the topic of coming out and these are must-read for both straight and LGBTQ+ people. This blog is dedicated to this topic. So, let’s have a look at what some of these novels are.

Books on the Topic of Coming Out

Some of the books on the theme of coming out are-

1. Stir Fry by Emma Donoghue- This is the story of a girl, Maria who has gone to Dublin, Ireland to study at a university. She unknowingly moves in with a lesbian couple who are named Ruth and Jael via a coded roommate advertisement. This leads to a maddening and complicated relationship between Maria, Ruth and Jael and eventually Maria to try and understand her relationship with desire.

2. I Can’t Think Straight by Shamim Sarif- The story of Tala is a very heart-warming romance wherein she is destined to be engaged to a man. But her destiny takes a turn when she meets a friend-of-a-friend Leyla who is a young British Indian woman. Tala is Palestinian and was born into a very traditional family. It now depends on Tala how she will be telling her family to cancel the marriage and let her live with Leyla with whom she has formed a romantic connection.

3. Mr Loverman by Bernardine Evaristo- It is a story of two men who have been secret lovers since they were in their teens. The names of the protagonists are Barry and Morris. Now, in their 70’s, these Caribbean-born Londoners want to be reunited together. Barry knows that something must change in his life and that it is destined that he must move in with Morris but he is not sure of how he can do that. Barry will have to show enough courage to leave his wife to move in permanently with Morris. This is a very great novel and will keep you fully hooked to the edge of your seat.

4. Speak No Evil by Uzodinma Iweala- The story of Niru who is now 18 and ready to get into Harvard to secure a bright future for himself. He is a Nigerian high schooler but has a dark secret- he’s gay and has only told his best friend, Meredith about it. But, when Niru’s father discovers this secret, the novel turns upside down and becomes a heartbreaking story. This is a very shocking novel.

5. Beijing Comrades by Bei Tong- This is a novel of the late 80s in China where the protagonist Handong is all about his career as a successful businessman until he meets up with Lan Yu who is a working-class architectural student. Their stormy romance begins when China is going through massive political demonstrations in the 80s. This is China’s first-ever gay novel written by an unknown author who goes by the pen name Bei Tong.

6. The Miseducation of Cameron Post by Emily M. Danforth- This is a very harrowing story of a girl named Cameron who moves in with her conservative relatives after the death of her parents in a car accident. She meets Coley, a new girl who has just arrived in her town, and a romance soon sparks between the two. This angers her relatives who then send Cameron to a conversion therapy camp. The story then continues with how Cameron and her fellow campers survive and will remain for a long time in the readers’ minds.

7. Juliet Takes a Breath by Gabby Rivera- This is the story of Juliet who is Puerto Rican by nationality and has already told her mom about her changed sexual preferences at her going away dinner and goes off to work as a summer intern at Portland with a white feminist author Harlowe. Juliet then goes through several situations in the novel such as getting her heart broken for the first time, learning about other queer people in her family, meeting some queer Black writers and having a sexy date with a library intern named Kira.

So, these are some novels for LGBTQ+ people who can read comfortably in their homes. These novels have truly captured the spirit of this community and talk in very comforting tones as to what struggles this community faces when they are out in the open wide world. We hope that you liked this blog and will be tempted to sample some of these books yourself. Till then, keep reading!!!